Not A Bad Thing
by winterrios69
Summary: After the events in the graveyard, Star does something risky. She calls someone. It's not her father. It's not her mother. It's not Pony Head. He's someone more... demonic.


**I wrote this for fun, and the characters will probably be a bit OOC. So read at your own risk and no flames. And to those of you following my Zootopia story there will be an update soon, and by soon it should be within the next few days. So keep a lookout for that. Oh, and who else died during the Bon Bon the Birthday Clown episode? The Winter Finale freaking killed me!** **Anyway, enjoy.**

Is this what Tom felt? This question has been on my mind for the last 10 hours since the whole graveyard incident with Ludo. Yes, my mind would wonder about my spell book and about Glossaryck, but...no matter how many times I tried not to think about him my mind would always go back to Tom. Well, okay, I take that back. I'd think about Marco with Jackie and then I'd think about Tom.

The feeling that I felt inside of me when I saw them together, how happy they were, and how much I hated it made me only hate myself. It made me sick. Not them having a good time and being happy, but what I felt toward it. Hate. Betrayal. Jealousy. I didn't like that they were enjoying themselves and that's what made me hate myself. I have no right to feel that way; to hate seeing them happy together. I have no right to be imagining me in Jackie's place. No right at all.

It's not rocket science to know that I'm jealous. I never thought I was the jealous type, and I've never been so wrong. This is where my thoughts on Tom come in. Is this what he felt when he would see me with Marco? Would he feel his own heart breaking and cry at night? Because Mewni knows when I cried a few hours ago it wasn't just for my mentor. Half of it was because of Marco.

Does he imagine that Marco is him when Marco and I are together? Does he think of different scenarios of us doing stupid, fluffy, lovey dovey stuff? Does he have a journal of all his thoughts about me?

And there's one last question: will he answer my call?

I know that it's six in the morning, and that he, just like everyone else in the house, is asleep, but I just had to talk to him. I need to. Is it risky? Yeah, probably. But...as much as it pains me to say this, I need to hear his advice. I need to hear his answers to my questions. I need...to apologize. If what I feel is anything related to what Tom has felt, or is probably still feeling, I need to apologize. Properly.

I don't know why I even doubted that he wouldn't answer because after five seconds I'm looking straight into his tired eyes through my magic mirror. "Whatever it is I didn't do it," he immediately said, grumpily as he rubbed his eyes. Probably because I woke him up. Oops. "You hear me? You always blame me for all the bad things that happen to your precious Marco, but I-"

"I'm sorry!" I blurted out, too impatient to wait for him to finish speaking, and desperately wanting to get it over with.

Tom stared at me with wide, surprised eyes. "I...what?" He stammered, unsure of what to say. Just like me.

I look away sadly, hugging myself since there was nothing else I could really hold onto, and felt my cheeks grow hot from embarrassment. I knew I shouldn't have done this. God, this is so embarrassing! Exes aren't suppose to talk to each other after they've broken up. Sure, Tom and I have spoken before after our break up, but our conversations were heated and snappy. Plus, he always initiated our conversations in the past. This time I'm the one who initiates the talking first. This is all on me now.

"I'm...I'm sorry," I cleared my throat so I could speak better and also so he couldn't hear how sad I had suddenly become. I was sad before I called him, but now it seems to have gotten worse. Is it because he's someone who knows how I feel? Maybe that's why this is harder than I'd thought it would be. Maybe it's the guilt eating away at me. Maybe it's karma and it's making me feel everything that Tom has felt. Heart ache, guilt, self blame...struggling with all three of those at once...how am I not crying again yet?

"For...for what, Star?" Tom asked. I look back at him and see confusion in his eyes, along with worry. Worry that shouldn't be there. He shouldn't feel worried for me. He should be angry. I'm angry. Not at Ludo, not at Marco, not at Jackie...I'm angry with myself and so should Tom. He has no right to be worried about me. And yet...I have no right to be jealous of Jackie.

"For breaking your heart," I answered in a soft whisper. "For making you feel...this...this horrible feeling. Like-like you're not good enough or...or-" Ah, there they are. Looks like the tears are back at it again. I tried to stop them from forming. There's no way I'm going to cry in front of Tom. That was never the plan. But, of course, things don't always go my way. I closed my eyes and felt them fall down my cheeks, getting them wet and stained. I squeezed my eyes tightly shut to stop anymore from falling, but that only made it worse. They just seeped right through like a dam breaking and flooding everything in sight.

Next thing I know, I feel and hear the heat and sizzling sound of fire. I open my eyes, my vision blurry, and see Tom's arms wrapping themselves around me. For a moment, I was frozen, but then, without a second thought, I wrap my arms around Tom's body and let out a heart breaking sob. He strokes my hair and whispers soothing words.

"It's okay," he assures me. "Let it out, Star. Let it all out."

And I did. My last crying session a few hours before was nothing compared to this. A few hours ago I was silently crying in my room, not gaining any sleep. Now I was able to let out ugly sobs that I knew no one would here. Not with my sound proof spell that I had used before I called Tom. I didn't want anyone to hear me talking with him, and by anyone I mean Marco. Then again, even if I didn't have the spell, he probably wouldn't wake up. He's too caught up in his dreams about Jackie.

"This..." I start, swallowing thickly, after I calmed down some. "Was not at all how I wanted this call to go down." I kept my head buried in his chest so I wouldn't have to look at him. I'm too embarrassed. I'm crying in my ex's arms over a boy I was never even dating that unintentionally broke my heart.

Tom chuckles. "This was not at all how I expected it to go down either. I expected yelling and arguing, not crying. Why are you crying by the way? What has you upset?"

"I..." I wanted to talk to him about Marco, but now I realize that it's the most stupidest thing ever. He doesn't even like Marco all that much. Sure, he doesn't hate him as much as he did before-they're somewhat friends now-but there still might be some resentment left. What was I thinking? I can't just talk to him about Marco, the boy he probably still hates a little. I can't just tell him about my feelings for Marco when he still has feelings for me. That's a horrible thing to do! I know that first hand every time Marco would talk to me about Jackie. It hurts. All I'll do is hurt him more.

I shook my head, which still rested on his chest. "It...it's nothing. I...I just needed to let the waters of sorrow flow a bit."

"Star," Tom said in a soft, but firm tone. He grabs my shoulders and gently pushes me away from him so he could look at me. I kept my gaze away, looking at everything that wasn't him. He surprised me when he put his hand under my chin and turned my head to face him. "This is obviously not nothing. If it was, you wouldn't have called me at six in the morning. Demons need to sleep too, you know. What's wrong?"

"I...I can't. I'm embarrassed." I admitted, looking away once more.

"Is this about Marco?"

I snapped my head back to look at him so fast that it gave me whiplash. "W-What? Why-why would this be about him? I-I have no idea what you're talking about. Not everything is about Marco." My eyes were wide with panic, and I was talking nervously fast. Yeah, I'm a horrible liar and I'm sure Tom knows it.

"If it wasn't about Marco he'd be here with you right now," Tom stated in a 'duh' tone. "Now will you please tell me what's wrong so I can try my best to comfort you? And what did you mean earlier when you told me you're sorry for breaking my heart? What's going on?"

I knew I couldn't just push him away and tell him to leave me alone. I'm the one who called him. He's confused and wants answers as to why I called him, of all people. That's why I called him to begin with because I want answers as well.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. "You're right. This is about Marco." I paused waiting for his reaction.

"And?" He urged.

I sighed and sat down on the floor, resting my back against the wall. "And it's also about his crush Jackie."

It was like a lightbulb went off in his head. He suddenly realized where this was going and his face softens, sympathy written in his eyes. "Oh, Star." He sits down next to me and waits for me to continue speaking.

I explained to him how my feelings for Marco came to be. I told him about how I lied during the sleepover party and nearly got my friends and I killed. All because I was too stubborn and scared to admit it was me who lied about my so-called "crush" on Oskar. I told him about last night in the cemetery and how I spied on Marco and Jackie, and how Ludo has my spell book and Glossaryck. I told him everything. It all just poured out of me. I'm surprised he was able to keep up with me.

"And then, out of the blue, I thought of you." For the first time since I started talking, I paused to take in his reaction. He was surprised, of course he was, but he was also confused.

"Why?" He asked.

I shrugged. "I don't know. You just kinda...popped up. You always did tend to arrive in places where you're not wanted." I flashed him a playful smile so he'd know I was teasing.

He chuckles and nods. "Yeah, that's true. Proceed."

"Yeah, so, anyway," I continued. "You came to mind and I thought...Is this what Tom felt? Is this the burning feeling of jealousy that consumed him? Does he feel as though he isn't good enough?" I kept my gaze on my hands as I fiddled with them and ignored the heat that rose in my cheeks from the embarrassment and awkwardness.

Tom said nothing for a few seconds, and when I looked back up at him, he was looking at his own hands.

"Did you?" I asked, already knowing the answer just by looking at his face.

He slowly looks up at me and says the one word that made my guilt resurface. "Yes. I still feel that way."

Tears sprang to my eyes again. "Tom...I'm so sorry. I know things didn't exactly end well with us, but I never, never, wanted you to feel like this." I then laughed bitterly. "God, karma sucks. I bet you're enjoying this, huh?"

"No!" Tom exclaimed, making me jump. He noticed and blushed in embarrassment. "Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you. I just..." He sighs as he ran a hand through his hair. "I may be a demon, and we might have had our differences before, but not even I would enjoy seeing you suffer like you are now. In case you forgot, I care for you a lot."

I know. That's why this is hard. And awkward. And embarrassing. Ugh!

"I admit," he continued, "For a short time I wanted you to feel what I felt. To know what it was like. But...I knew that was wrong. I loved you way too much to actually, truly wish that upon you. I guess my wish didn't come true because here you are, broken hearted just as I once was."

"Do you think you can forgive me?" I asked, hoping that he'd say yes.

Tom chuckles as he shook his head, which for a moment, made me think he'd say no. "Star, I've already forgiven you."

I smiled widely at him and threw my arms around him, hugging him tightly. "You have no idea how relieved I am."

Tom was too shocked to hug me back immediately, but he eventually hugged me back. I wasn't letting go until he did. "Does this mean things are good between us now?"

I nodded. "I don't see why not. After all, while its rare, it's not uncommon for exes to remain friends."

Tom hugged me tighter at this. "I'm glad to have you as a friend. Sure, I'd rather you be my girlfriend, but if the only way for me to have you in my life is for us to be friends then so be it."

I giggled softly and released him. "Maybe I'll bring you along on one of my adventures."

His eyes lit up with excitement. "Really?!"

"Really," I assured him.

"You know, I thought you'd hate me forever," Tom started, rubbing his neck as he did so. "But now I see I was wrong. And the person for me to thank for that is Marco. Wow. Did not see that coming. He really isn't all that bad, to be honest. I can see why you've developed a crush on him. I'm just surprised he hasn't realized that you have a crush on him. I mean, it's totally obvious."

"No it's not!" I defended, hoping he was wrong. Oh my god, what if he's right? Was I really that obvious? What if Marco knows? Oh god, oh god, oh god!

"Calm down, Starship," Tom says, amused, using my old nickname."If you're worried whether Marco knows of your crush I would stop worrying about it. He's stupidly oblivious to it all."

Tom sounded so certain of it that it managed to convince me. "Yeah, okay. So...you don't think it's stupid of me to have fallen for him? I'm honestly surprised it took Jackie this long to like him back. I mean, honestly, what's not to like?" I chose my words carefully in case I upset him, but he didn't seemed phased by anything.

"Well, that mole of his is sure ugly-"

Without thinking, I smacked him hard. "You take that back! That mole of his is a mark of beauty! Beauty I tell you!"

Tom laughs. "If you say so. To answer your question though, I don't think you're stupid for falling for him. I mean, obviously I'm better but-" He stopped when he saw my annoyed expression. "But...I guess he isn't too bad. You have good taste."

And there goes the blushing again. "Oh yeah?"

"Yeah," Tom laughed at my flustered face, which only made me blush some more. "He has a good singing voice too."

"I know. He sings in the shower a lot." I giggled as I remembered the first time I heard him sing. Wait a minute..."Wait how do you know-"

"Long story, not enough time." He interrupts, laughing to himself.

I roll my eyes. "What should I do about it all?" I then asked. "About Marco and my feelings? What do I do?"

"Well, don't do what I always did-"

"Way ahead of you there."

"Just let everything flow like it's supposed to be. Don't force it. Give it time."

I let his words sink in. "That...was a really wise response." I said, surprised. "I'm impressed."

Tom smirks. "It just comes naturally to me."

I shoved him playfully. "Dork. But you're right. I should just let everything play out on its own. Thank you so much for staying and talking with me Tom. I really needed it."

Tom stood up and extended his hand for me to take. I take it and he helps me up. "No, problem. You can call me anytime." He then winks at me.

I raise an eyebrow at him. "Are you flirting with me?"

Tom grins. "What? Friends can flirt with each other. It's called a flirtationship. Look it up."

I rolled my eyes again, grabbed him by the shoulders, and turned him around. "Maybe later. Now get out of here. It's almost seven and everyone will be up soon. Plus, I think you're still tired. Go back to sleep."

"Okay, okay," Tom said. "But I can tell you haven't been to sleep yet, so you better promise me you'll go to sleep too."

"As the heir to the Mewni throne I hereby promise thee that I will sleep for a good twelve hours. Sound good to you?"

"Meh, it could have been better." Tom joked, turning back around to face me. He gives me a small wave and says, "Bye bye, Butterfly."

"See you later, _Tom_ inator." I replied and watched as he teleported himself home, engulfing himself with flames.

As I headed back to my room, I went ahead and checked on Marco. He was sleeping peacefully as ever, and his sleeping face put a smile on mine. Marco is a lot of things, and whether he knows it or not he has a lot of skills and talents. I just never would have thought that he'd be so talented he'd also be able to make my ex and I become friends again.

What else can Marco do? And whatever it is...will it break my heart or not? Only time will tell, and that's exactly what I need.

Time. I need time to figure things out and to let them flow naturally. Looks like calling Tom wasn't such a bad idea after all. For once in my life I'm actually going to follow through with what Tom said. And maybe for once...

It's not a bad thing.


End file.
